Everything You Need to Know in 1 minute, 22 seconds

Chezza as Dada

I've been a fan of the Dada artist movement for years and decided to attempt collage on my own. Not with a political message but one more of visual stimulation taken from art & symbol books. Enjoy (and excuse the bad photos, I'm limited by my blackberry camera.)

Twin Love - Does it Really Exist?

Today my friend, Jess posted a video on Facebook about the idea of having a twin soul mate and that our desire for a "soul mate" is engraved in our DNA and that we "harbor a desire and unity and search for a piece that is always missing" and that during our lives we are on a "quest for wholeness that isn't readily available."

For the past 10 plus years, I have learned, through ardent practice, to be able to decipher a reaction that comes from my Ego versus one from my Heart and I feel these ideas perpetuate concepts (and the operative is concept) that support a socialized reaction to marriage and something I don't personally believe in. If you watch any nature show, you learn about our own instincts. In most instances, the male species does their thing and then goes off. There are instances of "family" and I do believe that can work, but it's not something we are made to believe we have to strive for. Water, insects, mammals - they don't act from an obligation and how many people end up staying in relationships they feel an obligation to rather than being there out of choice? How many people truly feel whole and in love with themselves? I'm not talking love from what they have or what they've done in their lives, but true love just for the fact they breathe? What do we have to offer to our romantic partners if we don't feel this inward love of ourselves?

Our society is constructed on the belief that you are not desirable if you do not have a significant other, which leads to a mass amount of negative energy that comes from people who actually get depressed because they are alone and feel lonely. There is a huge distinction between those two feelings. To be alone is to give to yourself and to get to know yourself like you would a lover. To feel lonely is a theme that stems from the media - everything from movies, television to music. If you can't detach yourself from these melancholic notions, your sad, negative energy litters the earth, instead of being stronger and finding purpose within yourself.

I believe Love is the core of everything. For me, it's that feeling of bliss and enthusiasm that is our true essence and allows us to react from the most positive space of instant forgiveness and gratitude for everything in our lives - no matter what the outward appearance. It's always a choice. Perhaps not always an easy choice but if we do the work, the struggle decreases.

What feels like the truth to me (and I can only go by what I feel because I don't believe in my thoughts) is that we are individual energy that travels in groups and are brought together with people we have different levels of karma with from past lives to work out in the current life. The levels of karma are insignificant (people you pass on the street, are in a bank line with, etc.) to significant (your partner, family and friends.)

All this said, I can be romantic and don't feel that intimate relationships have to be matter of fact and dry. In fact, the opposite. We are lucky enough to be human and to express ourselves more than animals can, but we've grown attachments through this idea instead of being free to love and to leave when the moment presents itself. Having been both in long term relationships and single, I love having a partner in my life where the partnership is key and the sexual/romantic nature is exhilarating. But we simply cannot predict if we will want to have sex with the same person our entire lives. It's an idealistic notion that we have fed to us every day. I am loyal and actually have an ability to be attracted to one partner for a long time. In fact, I've never tired of my lovers, but who is to say it wouldn't happen someday? If you have a strong partnership/friendship, why does a change in the sexual desire of the relationship have to be a negative factor at all? Why can't your "twin" be with you despite any challenges? To me, that is true friendship.

Pastels Playing Peacefully

My friend Reavis thinks I'm into pastels, but I'm not. In fact, I abhor them, much preferring bold and vivid colors. At any rate, I mostly wear black anyway. However, metaphorically speaking, I do have a pastel heart in that it's soft and delicate. I'm sure that's what Reavis meant when he sent me this Cocteau Twins video thinking it a "very Chezza blog" posting. Well, he's right in this case. The Cocteau Twins are the masters of 80s ethereal realness and I'm all about it. I remember during my youthful days of hardcore shows and slam dancing, I actually hated them thinking them too soft. Soon after I matured into my -- again pastel side -- and they moved up to one of my favorite bands. This song "Oomingmak" comes from one of my Top 10 favorite albums of all time Victorialand (quite a feat, I love a lot of bands.)

Enjoy. I think it's time we all acknowledge our inner Pastel. Thank you Reavis for reminding me of this.

Shivaya Namah Om

Today I offer you Shiva, the destroyer in the Brahma, Vishnu triumvirate (the creator and sustainer, respectively.) Enjoy! Om.

Tall Trees in Georgia

In the summer of 2007, my lovely friend Morgan surreptitiously added some cover songs she recorded to my itunes and it took this long until my shuffle actually got around to playing them. I was instantly taken with the song, "Tall Trees in Georgia", which was originally written by Buffy Sainte-Marie (who ironically enough, Timo turned me onto last summer.) I went to Youtube to see if the original video was there and found a rendition by Eva Cassidy. I was immediately taken with Eva's energy. She sits there humbly in front of the audience, acoustic guitar in hand and announces this song as one she's loved since she was a little girl. She sings it so beautifully and when I listened to the words, they described so much of my own life. I looked Eva up and was sad to see that she had passed away from melanoma back in 1996 and that her success came posthumously after someone found her cover of "Over the Rainbow". This is a shout out to a wonderful energy and gratitude for having found her mellifluous voice now. Better late than never.

*MUSIC REVIEW* - Biker Period

One day I was having an epiphany about a photo series that would include really hard men, you know the Hell’s Angel type doing really soft things, like playing with puppies or smelling flowers, etc. I thought this would be an amazing way to show that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover (although that said, most people do wear their inner essence on their outer sleeve.) In a very synergistic moment, my friend, Timo from New York called to tell me he just collaborated with a cellist, Kristen McCord to create an ethereal, ambient body of work and they were naming it, “Biker Period.” I was blown away because that became the perfect name for the visual I was getting. What if rough men got their period and experienced that type of emotional vulnerability that women do each month? Of course, apart from a couple of courses in college, I am no photographer, but the two fit together all the same.

Biker Period is the first ambient music to challenge the top contender on my list, the mighty Brian Eno. Their Myspace page, which describes them as “visual/experimental/southern rock”, is humorously oxymoronic being filled with a string of repetitive somewhat disturbing images and descriptions of being part heaven and part hell. As you wait patiently for the player to kick in (depending on your connection and how well the Myspace server is doing that day), there is no doubt that if heaven had theme music, this would be it.

The song “Wall” begins with lilting guitars that fill my lungs with new breath and once the cello kicks in, tears well in my eyes and make me optimistic for a better world. It may sound a bit grandiose but this makes me experience the beauty of melancholy. Many great saints have said the beauty is in the longing and “Wall” is the perfect song to reflect that longing of your truest desire and inspires fearless faith.

“Balls” kicks in with a little more gusto. The urgent plucking that acts like a door knocking, asking, “Are you there?” The cello responds and lets you know that I am here and I will be there for you as long as you need me. The crescendos reflect the vicissitudes of our lives; the changes in our moods when we feel like we are swinging from a vine, back & forth and wishing for the stillness of serenity while trying to find it within no matter what is happening externally. At one point, you experience bliss and literally hear the cawing of birds. You realize you are present and aware of the moment, which is a rarity in our lives that usually are filled with thoughts of a limiting past and projection of a future that doesn’t exist.

The gravitational pull of “To” almost inspired me to go into spontaneous meditation. Again, they use lilting sounds to draw you into their experience of heaven. You go through the darkness of a moonless night to the light of the sun and then back again into the dark to experience the journey all over again. They add a bit of vocals to accentuate the tone of the instruments, adding more delightful crescendos (honestly, who doesn’t love a good crescendo?)

“Meat” is the darkest note of the bunch and a hint of the hell that they describe. There is a nightmarish tone to it and screams of frustration that are only short-lived but feelings we have just the same. This song being the shortest of the bunch, says to me that the negative doesn’t have to outweigh the positive and if we can drop what we don’t desire quickly, we are more apt to get to what we do choose for ourselves even faster.

Biker Period is only one of the many musical projects that Timo Ellis has going on. Check them out on www.myspace.com/bikerperiod, Timo at www.myspace.com/therealtimoellis and Kristen McCord at www.myspace.com/kirstenmccord.